Will you be voting in the election?

[Lisa Quinn]

Maybe??
Don't worry, after the glorious revolution the whole country will be able to wallow in Jam 'n' Custard Jammy Dodgers. Ooooh, I can feel a manifesto coming on
J x

As a Northern lass, I don't want none of that posh stuff coming up here thankee Jayne! We like our lard butties and stout, we need summat sturdy when we have come back up from pit!

[lesley]

What's the difference between Gary Glitter and Arthur Scargill? No........I can't.

As a Northern, Jammy Dodger hater, who believes lard is for swimmers and not butties, I will be voting for the same organ jugglers as usual.

"Arthur Scargill - great strike, disappointing result."

[geti-titanium]

Not sure I understand. Can you complete the following survey please? :

Are you situated
a) North, or;
b) South
of Watford?

It's a common phallic symbol, Jayne, that there is a mystical line that separates the North and South of the country passing through Watford.

I can now categorically dispel this myth that it runs through Watford. The line is actually much thicker than first thought and is called 'The Midlands' which is neither North nor South. This area has long been known for spawning great intellect, the best looking inhabitants and ingenuity.

Unfortunately we are plagued with the worst accents and have been raised on a diet consisting of chips, mushy paes and Ginsters pasties, which has left some of us with a flatulence problem and contributes immensely to global warming (fortunately I escaped that one!).

However we do have a high influx of immigrants, second only to our once great capital Londinium, and the waiting list to get in can be as long as 45 minutes, depending which bus you are on.

[elliboo]

It's a common phallic symbol, Jayne, that there is a mystical line that separates the North and South of the country passing through Watford.

I can now categorically dispel this myth that it runs through Watford. The line is actually much thicker than first thought and is called 'The Midlands' which is neither North nor South. This area has long been known for spawning great intellect, the best looking inhabitants and ingenuity.

Unfortunately we are plagued with the worst accents and have been raised on a diet consisting of chips, mushy paes and Ginsters pasties, which has left some of us with a flatulence problem and contributes immensely to global warming (fortunately I escaped that one!).

However we do have a high influx of immigrants, second only to our once great capital Londinium, and the waiting list to get in can be as long as 45 minutes, depending which bus you are on.

As a fellow Midlander (now relocated up north) I find I must concur with Geti! Although I must add Staffordshire oatcakes to your list of delicacies (at least for this potbank girl!) and I think the flatulence is mostly the menfolk

[kymbi]

The north starts at the Watford Gap? Nah, as a south-londoner, the north starts on the opposite site of the River Thames. Fortunately, my feet are kept firmly on the ground by my OH from scottish mining stock.

[Jayne]

Ummm Alan, still not quite getting it. A few more questions if that's okay:

It's a common phallic symbol

why/how phallic symbol?

'The Midlands' which is neither North nor South. This area has long been known for spawning great intellect, the best looking inhabitants and ingenuity.

Does this area include Norfolk? Please list examples of the good looking & ingenious.

diet consisting of chips, mushy paes and Ginsters pasties

Ginsters pasties originate from Cornwall. Do trade links exist between this 'Midlands' place and the rest of the country? Do you have to buy them on the black market?

plagued with the worst accents

bath or barth?

I must say that this is all quite fascinating. Here, in the area that lies to the South of Watford we are still governed by the customs and habits of the Norman Court. Everyone must speak French in public places, present a half of all their produce to the local nobleman (usually bananas and oranges) and pledge allegiance to Marcel Marceau once a month to avoid being burnt as a witch. Oh, and grow our leg hair......gawd! I hate that one!
J x

[Mila Jewellery]

Does this area include Norfolk? Please list examples of the good looking & ingenious.

Well there's me and Bridget over here lol

[Gemma]

As a Stokie living in Southampton for ...ummm the past nearly 10 years I am considered super Northern even though I see myself as a midlander.
I miss meat and potato pies You just can't get them down here.

Oh and the kids here used to take the p*** out of me for telling them to open their text boooooks rather than text buks and one of them in particular used to cringe when I said graph instead of grrarph.

Though I do think we've got slightly off the topic of Dennis' pretty goodies

[Sunnybank]

Though I do think we've got slightly off the topic of Dennis' pretty goodies

A very apt interpretation of an unusual source of inspiration and beautifully executed, Dennis. Yes I'll be voting, always have, just wish more people would as some turn out rates are appalling.

[snow_imp]

just wish more people would as some turn out rates are appalling.

But if you could vote by phone, maybe we'd get as good a turn out as for X factor!!!!