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Dear Su, my thoughts are with you at this difficult time in your life, I too have been through it, but it was I that ended my first marriage,(he had stopped being a husband and became a housemate). We had grown apart for a while and one morning I woke up and said to myself that I could no longer carry on the facade of a ' happy marriage'. It took me a while to adjust and after a while I met a wonderful man who loves me for me, and we have been married for nearly 4 years. You are at the begining of your new journey, but believe it my friend that it will make you stronger, just believe in yourself and take one day at a time:X[], and remember.........we are only a click away.
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My thoughts are with you Su, you never know what the future can hold just take each day as it comes, some will be bad, some will be good, my husband walked out on me after 15yrs with absolutely no warning at all, just came home from work one day and said he was off, it was very very hard and after swearing to be amicable things did turn nasty for a while but after actually getting to the point of having signed the divorce papers and getting ready to file them we actually got back together( we were apart 14 months in total),that was 3 years ago, it took a long while and a lot of talking but we got there,may be this was the right thing maybe not, only time will tell,whatever happens with you try to stay strong and remember you are not alone and somebody somewhere is there to help you through, whether it's some one you know personally or a total stranger,people can and will help you x x x x
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Oh my God Su. Just read this thread. I am so sorry to hear your news. I feel so sad for you. But you seem to be handling it amazingly well. I can't believe you are looking at the positive already, instead of being a heap of jelly, as I would be. I am very pleased that you can remain amicable. And I hope that it continues. Don't worry about the nights. You can spend those with us.
All my love and kisses,
Linda
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Hi Su,
I did wonder after we spoke the other day if this would be the outcome. It will be tough for both of you and change can be very intimidating. Maybe it's better to have this kind of clean break rather than you both chipping away at each other over a long period, people do grow apart, it just happens and neither person is to blame.
You are one of the most positive people I know who always has time for a kind or funny word for everyone. You probably don't realise just how strong you are but it will come to you over the next few weeks. The fact that it looks as if you can still be friends is good, I really hope it stays that way.
Take your time and go at your own pace (you can do that now you know) and remember we're here whenever you need a hug or moral support or just someboby to rant at.
:X[[]]:X
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you guys have given me so much strngth today, i just cant thank you enough. As the time is passing i feel more and more that he was right to stop the rot or however you would like it to be put. He is a very good man, and deserves some fun, and i was just not willing to trot along anymore and wanted to do stuff that i liked too, and so it just got too much for him.. My laptop was his pet hate
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See, Su, I think the issue is that decades ago we didn't live so long so marriages were shorter. Can you honestly say you are the same person now as you was 30 years ago? No - and neither is he. The me I was 30 years ago was a selfish strumpet - truly.
If you both grow together - great. If you have the sort of relationship that is a sanctuary but allows for you to grow separately - great. If you have any other type of relationship - well, there's the problem.
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Sorry to hear your news Su and I send you lots of love.
As most people have said in one way or another time is a great healer and I would just like to add that at least you had the courage to love and have lots of positive memories and I'm sure plenty of new positive memories ahead of you in the future.
The way you are discussing this seems very courageous I hope you will see light at the end of the tunnel soon x
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Su, I've only just read this thread, and I don't want to repeat all the absolutely spot-on things people have said, but please remember we are all here to lend a friendly ear and hug whenever you need it. (Perhaps a too close for comfort really....it'll almost be awkward ;)).
Thinking of you Su.
Vivia xXx
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Ohhhh....this is better than coronation street!:snow: